After I had my last child I got my tubes tied, and I haven’t been back to the gynecologist since. No need for birth control no need to go. I saw enough of the obgyn during my 20s and early 30s. I practically lived there for a decade. It got to the point where I was not at all uncomfortable just scooting the edge of the table with my knees apart. After all those years being on quite intimate terms with that particular doctor’s office once I had my last child I figured we needed a break. It has been about 4 years since I went. I probably could have held off a little bit longer, but lately I have been concerned about my health. No reason other than my mother died in her 40s, and while I am not there yet, I see it and fear the next few years of my life will be spent worrying about every single ache and pain or potential pain.
I called and made an appointment. The sooner I could get in and have my mind put at ease that all my female parts were healthy the better. The flip side was that if something were wrong the sooner I could get it fixed the better. I put the date on the calendar and waited. About 4 or 5 days before my appointment something happened. I started my period. I wasn’t really sure what to do. I could reschedule but it might not be for awhile, and then I would have to sit with my hypochondria. Also, as my periods aren’t super regular, I wasn’t sure that this same situation wouldn’t happen again. I decided to suck it up and go. I figured this doctor sees poop and blood during delivery so my period wouldn’t really matter. Still, it felt a little dirty and a little wrong. I went back and forth in my mind, but I already had everything lined up to go so I went.
I told the nurse and she didn’t even care. She didn’t flinch or anything. The doctor came in and I told him. He wasn’t phased either. I am glad no one was telling me how weird I was for scheduling this exam during my period, but I didn’t expect them to be like this is just another day in the office. Though in all fairness I guess it was. It all went like it should and has the other thousand times I have had exams until he examined me rectally. Um. I knew some doctors did that to get a better feel-so to speak-but I was not prepared, so now it was my turn to act like this was just another day at the gynecologist. To make it causal I ask, “So, everything looking good down there?” I wonder if this was payback for coming in on my period. “Oh yeah everything looks great,” he replies. Lovely.
I guess putting self-care and myself back on the list isn’t always going be pretty. Turns out that it will be a little messy and uncomfortable.