What the Crap?

I was at soccer practice for one of my sons and had my two youngest with me as well. They played at the playground while I watched practice. About half way through my youngest comes up to me and tells me he needs to go to the bathroom. So I grab the kids and walk across the park to this little shelter with a bathroom. These bathrooms aren’t great there isn’t even a light that turns on. Still, they do have a toilet which is all we really needed. The ladies toilet was being used so we just sucked it up and went to the men’s toilet. My son decided after a couple minutes that he would pee only. He didn’t feel comfortable enough to poop in this dark shelter toilet.

We made it back to the playground and the kids went back to playing on the playground while I watched their older brother. At the end of practice I was scanning the playground when I noticed this small child with his pants off squatting under the playground set. I knew right away. I knew that was my child. I wondered if I could pretend it didn’t happen. I wondered if maybe I could claim he wasn’t mine. If you don’t look at it then it isn’t really happening-right? He took a step out with his underwear and shorts in one hand and his other hand holding up his shirt. He looked at me and said,” I need a bath.” Yup. He really did. I mean yeah. I had to take him home in my car too. There was poop up and down his legs. Both sides. His hands had poop. His butt had poop. He was covered. I nervously glanced under the playground set and saw a big log. At least it was solid. At least it was just one. At least his shorts were already covered in poop so I could just crawl under the playground set and grab it. When your child poops on the playground you try to look for the positives. We left that playground when all the other kids and their parents and siblings were leaving that playground. My son walked across the playground no underwear, no shorts, shirt being held above his belly, and the lower half of his body covered in poop smear. After a quick stop to the garbage to dispose of the evidence we went to the car.

I took my older son’s water bottle, found a tissue box, and cleaned him off the best I could in the parking lot. I put those shorts back on cuz the underwear were not very usable, and buckled him in the carseat. It is a sure sign that he is my youngest by the fact that I wasn’t angry, I didn’t yell, and I wasn’t even that embarrassed walking him out of the park. After I got him in the car I just asked him why. Why when we had gone to the bathroom did he decide to go under the playground set? His answer was very simple. He wanted to go at home where he was comfortable going, but he got to a point he just couldn’t hold it anymore. He didn’t want anyone to see him so he hid under the playground set.

I mean- “What the crap?” Really. In every way. At least he is honest. A little disgusting but honest.IMG_0150

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